Category Archives: Mastering Thought

Making The Mind Your Best Friend—Overcome Negative Thinking—Becoming A Master Of Thought—(Part 3)

Making The Mind Your Best Friend—How to overcome negative thinking and live the good life.

Our mind reacts to our environment a rather reflexive way.

Thoughts run in and out of our awareness on a practically constant basis, producing sometimes irrational and some being outright strange images, beliefs, and feelings.

The issue I’d like to tackle here is that we tend to take our thoughts seriously which can make the mind your biggest enemy.

Let’s Make The Mind Your Best Friend

Our thoughts and our mind helps guide us through some of life’s most challenging events and tasks such as succeeding in our work/career, completing an education, and navigating relationships.

Our mind helps us to problem-solve, discover new things, concentrate on difficult tasks, and recall information.

These are just a few examples of the functions of our mind and our thoughts and they are essential to our survival as a species.

We Rely On It To Get Us Through Life, To Achieve, And To Grow.

We lean heavily into these incredible ability’s of mind and learn to attach ourselves to it and and thought.

But What Happens When Our Thoughts Are Not Useful, Goal-Oriented, And Efficient?

What happens when our thoughts take us places we don’t want to go?

Although our mind produces thoughts that help us through purposeful tasks, we must realize that our mind, when left on its own to wander, will begin a process that I like to call random creation.

The mind will serve this purposeless function of creating thoughts that are not necessarily in line with who we are, what we feel, and what we believe.

We internalize these thoughts, thinking that the thoughts represent us, that the thoughts are a depiction of what is going on within us and around us.

We believe that we are our thoughts.

This Is Commonly Referred To As Being Overly Attached To Our Thoughts.

When our thoughts take an unexpected (and unhelpful) direction, its like being in the driver’s seat of a car, but feeling as if someone else is controlling the steering wheel, the gas pedal, and the brakes, all at the same time.

We try desperately to take control of the wheel due to fear of crashing and in our desperation, we risk doing just that: Crash.

We start to focus on the things we don’t want to think about and in turn, think about them even more.

The Trick Is To Cease Control Completely.

Let go of the wheel.

How do you let go?

Just as you would a heavy bag.

Drop it.

Don’t try to control the thoughts.

Let them go.

When we are attached/separate, we realize that our mind is developing thoughts that do not represent who we are, but we struggle to draw the line in the sand between the self and thought.

We engage in harshly judging the thoughts (and ourselves too) and we can become emotionally and even physically drained by our thoughts, as they can at times dictate how we function and the quality of our day-to-day life.

This creates a self-reinforcing loop of suffering that is simply not necessary.

The person who suffers before it is necessary, suffers more than is necessary.

When the self and thought are separate, we are free from the emotional burden that thoughts can create.

We see thoughts as a separate entity from the self and this is when we interpret thoughts as neither good or bad, helpful or harmful, positive or negative.

We are able to observe thoughts as they come and go without feeling shame, anxiety, worry, or sadness as a result.

This gives us the clarity to become more present in our lives, to make better decisions, to experience greater creativity, and to enjoy our lives more freely.

As Mentioned Earlier…

The mind can be your best friend, helping you solve problem, build meaningful relationships, and bring  safety to your ;life.

However, the mind can be your worst enemy, telling you things like ‘you’re not good enough,’ ‘you don’t deserve what you want,’ or something as severe as ‘you should kill yourself.’

In my life, I have experience those, and many more negative thoughts pop into my head.

Fortunately, I was able to rectify this relationship between myself and the mind.

Here Is How…

See the mind as a garden.

Thoughts such as ‘you aren’t good enough’ are the weeds of your garden.

Thoughts such as ‘what can I learn from this?’ ‘what am I grateful for,’ or ‘how can I use this experience to help me in the future;’ are the roses and tulips.

It takes very little, if any, work for weeds to grow in your garden.

As in, if you don’t tend to your garden the weeds will grow.

The Key To A Healthy Garden

A.K.A. a healthy mind.

Is to tend your garden.

You have to plant the seeds of the type of vegetation you want reap later on.

You must tend to these seeds by watering them, fertilizing them, and pull out any weeds before they grow bigger—kill the monster while it’s small.

If You Wish To Reap Roses, Plant Rose Seeds.

What I really mean is if you want to feel a happy, plant the seeds of happiness in your mind.

Do things you love to do, read books that inspire you, listen to motivational speeches.

If you want to be a successful entrepreneur, then the seeds you want to plant are that of hard work, self-education, tenacity, strength, and wisdom.

If you are someone who wants to be successful entrepreneur and are drinking every night, you are basically planting cucumber seeds, expecting a rose to sprout.

What You Sow Is What You Reap.

Sow the seeds of wisdom, inspiration, motivation, by reading something daily that will give you the insights you need to succeed at what it is you want to do.

Here is my challenge to you…

Right now, write down 3 of our worst habits.

Choose one of them you really don’t want in your life.

And dedicate yourself to changing that one habit.

Once that one is out of your life, move on to the next, and then the next.

IF you change all 3 bad habits and replace them with 3 new positive habits.

Your life 10, 15, 30 years from now will be a much more favorable place than where it would be with those habits.

We are all self made, but only the successful are willing to admit it.

If you liked this or any of our other posts, share it so your friends can see it.

If you have questions leave a comment or message us on our facebook page!

With Sincere Gratitude,

Nick Yurek

Life Coach

It’s ALL about Why

Why Do You Do What You Do?

Why do you do what you do?

Possibly the most important question you can ask someone.

The answer they give you can provide valuable insight into their motivation, beliefs, values, and rules about life.

He who has a why to live an bear almost any how” —Friedrich Neitzsche

I believe that life is 80% why and 20% how.

Which would mean that everything in your life; your income, your friends, your health, ect… is primarily the way it is because of you why.

The abundance, or lack of abundance, in your life is because you of you why…

If you are looking at your life and you see that you’re performing well at your job, it’s likely do to you having a very strong reason why you want to perform at a peak level.

You why could be because your work is something you LOVE doing…

Maybe it’s because you feel your work is impact, and has a deeper meaning to you.

Maybe it’s because you have kids and you want to provide the best life for them.

On the other hand…

You might be looking at an area of your life, for example your body, and thinking that it’s less than it could or should be.

I am here to tell you today that if you take some time to figure out why you’re lacking in this area, and most importantly, discover why you want to be healthier, more fit.

If you have a big enough reason why to do something, it will become a must.

Turn Your Should’s Into Must’s

People don’t change when they know they should do something…

People change when they must do something…

Once you make the transition from ‘I should do this.’

To ‘I MUST do this!’

Your entire life will be set on a totally  new,  and positive destination.

How to Trade Your Should’s For Must’s

Find a large enough reason why…

How to Discover Your Why

You can discover your why in many ways…

  • experience
  • failure
  • modeling others

But the most effective and quickest way to discover your reason why is by finding somewhere quiet and bring a pen and paper.

Turn your phone on airplane mode and set the timer for 1 hour.

Force yourself to sit there with the pen on paper for 60 minutes while you contemplate and illustrate the reason why you’re going to become healthier, become happier, become more successful.

The Best In The World

Discover Your Reason whyThe best in the world at any given field are where they are today because they worked as hard as they could.

They sacrificed their mornings, afternoons, evenings, weekends, and sleep to get to where they are today.

The things is that it’s not easy to achieve greatness, however what we all need to understand is that  when we have a compelling reason why…for instance wanting to be the absolute best you can be because there are people out there who believed in you while you didn’t believe in yourself, and they deserve to see you succeed…all the hard work will be not only worth it, but you will enjoy it.

That reason why is great because it is bigger than you.

It’s Bigger Than You

Realize that every day there are people depending on you for your energy, for you strength, for your love.

Everyday we have to go out and stick to a daily process, daily disciplines that help propel you forward.

Success does not come easy.

There Are No Such Thing of an Overnight Success

People tend to call successful people ‘over night successes…’

That is total bullshit.

It’s a long road ahead if you want to be successful.

If you can find me one person who has EVER become an overnight success I can  guarantee you that I can prove that you’re just trying to rationalize it in your head and that they’re actually worked for YEARS.

A great example of an ‘overnight success’ is Lebron James.

Everyone was shocked why he joined the NBA, “how can he have this natural born talent at such a young age?”

The dude had been playing basketball for 15 YEARS before he went pro.

Stick to the Process

Find your reason why, find out why you want to be successful, why you no longer want to live depressed, why you’re going to turn your life around.

Discover a set of daily disciplines that you can perform each day that will get you better.

This is What I Focus On

I focus on the process.

Each day I spend 2-3 hours minimum, as soon as I wake up, working on developing myself.

I do this to become more valuable as a person.

Because the true value of wealth is measured by if they took all your money away, what would you be worth?

Develop the skills necessary to handle the challenges life throws at you.

The Life I’ve Lived, Life Throws A Whole Lot At You

You will not be ready when life hits you with adversity.

The only way you’re going to be able to get up and out of bed and perform at your best is if you have a strong enough reason why to do it.

Your why will carry you to new heights.

It’s Not About Motivation, It’s About Why

I am constantly asked about how to become more motivated.

The answer is simple, having a BIG driving force (a big reason why to do something).

Because your reason why will make it so you aren’t having to push yourself, but you will be pulled to where you want to go.

I Am Here For You

I am here to help anyone and everyone who is looking for new ways to develop themselves into someone who has success.

I believe that success is something you attract by the person you become.

As your coach I can help you uncover a compelling reason why that will help pull you to where you deserve to be in life.

Together we can create success rituals that will help you to grow and expand your capabilities to heights you never thought possible.

Go to our Life Coaching Page to learn more!

 

With Sincere Gratitude,

Nick Yurek

Life Coach

 

 

The Will to Win by Berton Braley

If you want a thing bad enough

To go out and fight for it

Work day and night for it

Give up your time and your peace and your sleep for it

If only desire of it makes you quite mad enough never to tire of it

Makes you hold all other things tawdry a cheap for it

If life seems all empty and useless without it

And all that you scheme and you dream is about it

If gladly you’ll sweat for it; fret for it; plan for it

Lose all your terror of God and man for it

If simply you’ll go after that thing you want with all your capacity, strength, and sagacity

Faith, hope, and confidence, stern pertinacity

IF neither cold poverty, famish and gaunt

Nor sickness, Nor pain of body or brain

Can turn you away from the thing that you want

If dogged and grim you besiege and beset it…

You’ll Get It

 

What Does An Extraordinary Life Look Like To You: Mastering Thought (Part 2)

The first step to achieve anything is to define what you want now, what’s next, and what’s preventing you from having what you want.

In the post titled Why We Need Daily Personal Development we talked about the Raticular Activating System and why clarity is power.

In this post we will go over 3 questions to ask yourself to immediately turn that powerful part of your brain.

  1. What does an extraordinary quality of life look like for you NOW?
  2. What is the next level for you? 
  3. What is preventing you?

To maximize the effects of these questions, I highly suggest you write down your answers in a journal.

It is said that writing down your goals makes them 1000 times more likely to be achieved.

You can even use this website as an example of that, for years I’ve wanted to start my own website; three months after I finally wrote it on paper Becoming More Consulting was born.

1) What does an extraordinary quality of life look like for you NOW?

Write down in your journal, what an extraordinary life would look like for you right now.

Would you have more money?

Would you savor every moment as if it were your last? Would you be physically healthier?

Mentally healthier?

Would you have more control over your emotional patterns?

2) What’s the next level for you?

What would you change in your life?

What would you transform?

Your relationships?

Your finances?

Would you like to loose weight?

Gain muscle?

3) What’s preventing you from having what you want?

This is arguably one of the most important things to ask yourself.

What are you willing to give up/what are you willing to no longer do in order to have the extraordinary life you deserve?

What limiting belief is preventing you from achieving your goals?

What emotional pattern (i.e. binge eating) is holding you back?

What dominating thought is stopping you from enjoying the life you truly deserve?

Bonus: What are 2 thoughts you have daily that stress you out?

What are 2 thoughts you experience daily that stress you out? Not what thought you have weekly or monthly, but daily.

Is it that you don’t have the capital?

Is it that you don’t have the time?

My thoughts:

The bonus question I threw in here is an excellent question to ask yourself, because many people struggle with some form of dominating thought that derails their progress. Identifying the thought pattern separates you from the thought and allows you to override your programming to make a better decision.

I’d like to part ways today by saying that I truly love and appreciate your attention. I write these posts with the hope and faith that you will use them just as I use them to become a better person, strive for more, and contribute to others.

 

With Sincere Gratitude,

Nick Yurek

Performance and Development Coach

 

Become A Master of Thought Part 1

Our thoughts; what a thought truly is and how to evaluate thought for to become more than your mind.

What is thought really?

On a molecular level, a thoughts are an electric pattern of signal fired from neuron to neuron in the brain.Thoughts can be, and aren’t limited to, an idea or memory in the form of picture, sound, and are often accompanied by a body sensation or feeling.

How to evaluate thoughts to cultivate success, inner peace, and true joy?

Oftentimes I hear stories of people talking about a positive mental attitude and removing negative thought. Granted there is nothing wrong with having a positive mental attitude and fostering an optimistic view of things, the problem comes when we resist the negative thoughts.

It is simply in the nature of this 2 million year old lump of matter called the human brain to pick out what’s wrong in its environment— to find what is negative. It is the brains job to keep up out of danger, discomfort, and pain by focusing on what can hurt you.

When people are trying to make a turn around in their life, some decide to cultivate a positive mental attitude. The biggest challenge they have is that though they’ve decided to live life from this positive mindset, they get discouraged, frustrated, and even angry over reoccurring negative thoughts. So the question we must ask ourselves is—how do I keep a positive attitude in the face of adversity caused by my own mind?

First, I suggest we throw out the idea that thoughts are positive or negative. Instead, let’s label thoughts as helpful or harmful. For example, you have the idea to eat and the first thing that pops into your head is a nice double stacked bacon cheese burger—helpful or harmful?

Well that depends, you then have to think what outcome do I want from this meal? Is it to have something that nourishes your body? In which case, maybe it’s time to grab a salad and black beans. Or maybe it’s Saturday and you’ve been eating a slow carbohydrate diet to loose weight and today is your day to SPLURGE? In which case it’s time to eat.

Notice what I did there—I asked myself the question of what exactly do I want to get from this meal. By first asking that question, I was able to decide if I wanted the burger or not based on the context of what stage of my diet I’m in. When you have a thought that catches your attention

Here is how to deal with a harmful, ‘negative,’ thought:

  1. Accept 
  2. Feel
  3. Appreciate
  4. Transfer

Accept the fact that in this moment you are thinking negatively, judgmentally, selfishly.

Feel the negative thoughts accompanying body sensation, is it a tightening of the stomach or throat in discomfort; or maybe you are so deeply routed in the negative pattern that you actually feel a bit of comfort in talking yourself down. The latter is where I once found myself; but by using this technique and the others mentioned in this article I now have much more control over what gives me pain and what gives me pleasure

Appreciate the fact that your brain, the center of your nervous system, the part of your body which process sound, sight, taste, objects, and smells around you. Have you ever been in love? Thank your brain for allowing you to experience such a wonderful emotion.

Transfer your focus from what you don’t want (the negative thought) to what you do want. If you’re self-talk is about hating yourself, say “I like myself.” Something so simple literally alters the chemical signals in your brain and thus altering the direction your life is going.

 

With Sincere Gratitude,

Nick Yurek